Supporting a friend with cancer.

Every aspect of life changes after a cancer diagnosis. Every. day social dynamics change at school, work, and home. Thus, it can be difficult to stop cancer from overtaking your entire identity, especially due to the drastic physical effects of treatment. Gut-wrenching nausea, excruciating mouth sores, and changes in taste make it impossible to enjoy food. Shortness of breath, skin irritation, bone pain, and nerve damage cause intense discomfort. Ongoing pain and nausea require drugs that cause extreme drowsiness and brain fog, which makes it difficult to form thoughts and communicate. Constant fatigue makes it impossible to leave bed or do anything enjoyable.

This sudden change in body image, ability, and lifestyle undoubtedly causes serious distress. Anxiety about hospitalization, medical procedures, unfamiliar medications, and whether treatment is working causes fear and anger. Uncertainty about the future of one’s life and leaving family behind can become a harsh reality. Negativity and depression take over as patients feel helpless in their current reality. These emotional tolls not only present themselves with physical burdens, but also diminish hope in an already dire situation.

Keeping these difficulties in mind, having a strong support system can relieve some of the emotional and physical burdens that accompany cancer. Support from a friend or a family member may not only encourage a more positive outlook but can also lead to a better quality of life. Brief texts and regular calls serve as means to let your friend know that they are important to you and that you care for their wellbeing. Whether it be during visits or over the phone conversations, continuous dialogue with your friend can greatly alleviate some emotional stress. Remember to listen to your friend instead of forcing your expectations or advice onto them. Additionally, small gifts to show you care can be another way to support your friends. Useful items like fuzzy socks or movies can brighten their day. But above all else, the best gift is to stay mindful and respect your friend’s boundaries at all times. The ideas listed above are only a few of the many ways you can support a friend with cancer. Listed below are resources with further ideas as to how to help your friend build a strong support system.

How to Be a Friend to a Friend Who's Sick: Book by Letty Cottin Pogrebi

Saying Less and Doing More

How to be a friend to someone with cancer.

My Friend Has Cancer. How Can I Help?

Best and worst ways to support a friends with cancer.

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